Promises broken and plans cancelled

hmpph above is who i am today..

disebabkan kerja aku jadi begini..to many promises being broken and i have no heart to make plans with people. all the time i'll be in the office or will be around my dearest colleagues aja..

This morning i woke up feeling so tired..weh.as if i've worked for the whole week dy...instead baru 3 hari berkerja..but the reality, i've been working for 1 month straight without a break.saturdays and sundays included..cheih..not forgetting during my mc's as well.

Too many things happened. I’ve decided to tender my resignation this coming 28th lepas gaji..things got all screwed and my decision was final. I’ve planned to work in HSBC AGAIN!! serena agreed to help me.I've even planned to get the accounts screwed before i leave the company supaya gua puas hati !!!dapat delete 500k punyer billing pon gua dah puas hati ...

..........suddenly!REALITY HIT me hard on the forehead!!Yan told us her hubby was asked to leave to company.ON THE SPOT OK!! Kne retrenched...head counts dlm company was reduced untill 15 org jer...gile babi keji.all around,paper and news is screaming about down sizing companies and reducing manpower..PANG gua terdiam lalu berfikir.

Things might be so fucked up in the office..my contract might not be renewed due to that fucking issue they blame me on...I may cry everyday in the office facing all the fuckers...but no one's gonna pay me this much at this point of time.even tho its not worth it dgn tahap balaci nye kami berkerja..tapi aku mampu membayar hutang piutang ku yg tingginya mengalahkan gunung everest itu.

Not a single day being spend without thinking how much longer will i survive there..But there were no choice given to me...dgn parents yg tidak berkerja..aku bukanlah anak tunggal yg kisah hidupnye indah seperti fairy tales...

arghh aku sentiasa merindui zaman belaja dimana hidup tidak sesusah zaman aku berkerja...:(